moment of truth

it hurts.
it’s like the possibility of us together resurfaces.
it’s not about I could win her back.
it’s not about winning,
and it’s not even “back”.
but it is just a constant reminder
how a coward I was
how I did not take the leap of faith
and how I have always been the second one
always.
in retrospect
she gave me signs
she gave me blocks
and I saw them all
guess it’s all about me then.
I’m being selfish
but I think I need to protect myself
from any more
hurt.
I have tried to be just as normal for a while
but it just cannot be erased
it haunts me
it’s like a burden from the past that I do not want to take off.
no interference from me, for sure
and no hard feeling with you bro
but it’s really just about me and the same leap of faith, all over again.

And that's what I think. Your turn.

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